"The Great Burrito Extortion Case" (2006)

Epiphany Lyrics – Bowling for Soup

Stop before you get me started
Maybe I'll just go
I'm not exactly broken hearted
But I think you already know
That there's more to the story than I'm givin' up
Maybe I should just grow up

There's a picture of a girl somewhere
That fits this empty frame
And there's a song here somewhere with a happier refrain
It came to me, I think they call it an epiphany
And that's a big word

[Chorus:]
All I ever wanted was a little extra ordinary
Somewhat documented
And depicted in this book of memories
That's as empty as a broken glass,
Or a gas tank in my car
If you can hear me now,
Come out, come out, wherever you are

I try so hard not to remember
I wish I could forget
The thoughts of you in syndication
Just like the time I met Joan Jett
At a Grammy party on a Saturday night
After you and me had a big fight

There's a picture of a boy somewhere that fits your empty frame
I tried switching the station,
But the song remains the same
It came to me, think they call it an epiphany
That line was lame

[Chorus:]
All I ever wanted was a little extra ordinary
Somewhat documented
And depicted in this book of memories
That's as empty as a broken glass
Or a gas tank in my car
If you can hear me now,
Come out, come out, wherever you are

[Bridge]
Are you still at home?
Or did you go to Rome?
I swear I think I saw you on some Italian movie
Showing on the plane
I couldn't read your name
Subtitles don't work on the credits,
Man that's a shame
It's a shame now, me and you
No one to blame but, you

[Chorus:]
All I ever wanted was a little extra ordinary
Somewhat documented
And depicted in this book of memories
All I ever wanted was a little extra ordinary
Somewhat documented
And depicted in this book of memories
If you can hear me now
If you can hear him now,
If you can hear me now,
Come out, come out, wherever you are
Wherever you are
I think they call it an Epiphany

High School Never Ends Lyrics – Bowling for Soup

Four years you think for sure
That’s all you’ve got to endure
All the total dicks
All the stuck up chicks
So superficial, so immature
Then when you graduate
You take a look around and you say HEY WAIT
This is the same as where I just came from
I thought it was over
Aw that’s just great

The whole damn world is just as obsessed
With who‘s the best dressed and who‘s having sex,
Who‘s got the money, who gets the honeys,
Who‘s kinda cute and who‘s just a mess
And you still don’t have the right look
And you don’t have the right friends
Nothing changes but the faces, the names, and the trends
High school never ends

Check out the popular kids
You’ll never guess what Jessica did
How did Mary Kate lose all that weight
And Katie had a baby so I guess Tom’s straight
And the only thing that matters
Is climbing up that social ladder
Still care about your hair and the car you drive
Doesn’t matter if you’re sixteen or thirty-five

Reese Witherspoon,
She’s the prom queen
Bill Gates,
Captain of the chess team
Jack Black, the clown
Brad Pitt, the quarterback
I’ve seen it all before
I want my money back

The whole damn world is just as obsessed
With who’s the best dressed and who’s having sex,
Who’s in the clubs and who’s on the drugs,
Who’s throwing up before they digest
And you still don’t have the right look
And you don’t have the right friends
And you’re still listen to the same shit you did back then
High school never ends

High school never ends

The whole damn world is just as obsessed
With who‘s the best dressed and who‘s having sex,
Who‘s got the money, who gets the honeys,
Who‘s kinda cute and who‘s just a mess
And I still don’t have the right look
And I still have the same three friends
And I’m pretty much the same as I was back then
High school never ends

High school never ends

High school never ends

Here we go again

Val Kilmer Lyrics – Bowling for Soup

I always thought my movie
Would be a comedy
Not quite the tragedy that its become
More slapstick than chickflick
More Caddyshack than Breakfast At Tiffany's
So, thank me at the podium
For a lifetime of contribution
Turn on the cameras
Someone cue the extras
Hair and makeup to the set

Because the big screen's calling
Final casting call
Its your big shot baby your the next big star
On another stupid movie
'bout a guy with a broken heart
Is falling apart
Your headed for the cutting room floor
And in the sequel honey
I'm the guy who gets the girl

So if you miss my movie
Get the DVD
Check out the chemistry
Between you and me
Less 'Raising Arizona'
More 'Steel Magnolias'
So when you walk down that red carpet
I hope you trip and fall
I hope someone squirts you with a watergun
A super soaker filled with pee

Because the big screen's calling
Final casting call
Its your big shot baby your the next big star
On another stupid movie
About a guy with a broken heart
Is falling apart
Your headed for the cutting room floor
And in the sequel honey
I'm the guy who gets the girl

All apologies
To Kevin Costner
and that chick from monster
Give me Adam Sandler,
Will Ferrell, Belushi and even Val Kilmer
He was funny in 'Real Genius'

[Greg]
What about 'Top Gun'?
[Jaret]
No, 'Top Gun' wasn't funny
[Greg]
Whatever

Top secret was funny too
But he sucked as Batman

Because the big screen's calling
Final casting call
Its your big shot baby your the next big star
On another stupid movie
About a guy with a broken heart
Is falling apart

Steven Spielberg's calling and he's sending a car
It's your big shot baby, you're the next big star
Of another stupid movie
About a guy with a broken heart
Who's falling apart
Your headed for the cutting room floor
But in the sequel honey
I'm the guy who gets the girl

I'm the guy that gets the girl [repeat until the end]

[BACKGROUND (repeat until the end):]
Adam Sandler, Will Ferrell, BRIGHTelushi and Akroid, Chris Farley, Bill Murray in 'Stripes'.
Eddie Murphy till 90, Chris Rock and John Candy, the cast of Hollywood Knights.
Mike Myers, Jim Carrey and the Farelly Brothers are more my style.
'Terms of Endearment' I didn't get it.
I'd much rather shut up and smile.

I'm Gay Lyrics – Bowling for Soup

(This fucking song is all personality)
(Dude, that's the shit!)

Well we've all heard about
how the guys in the band
Weren't the popular kids in school
And now you hate your parents
'cause of the way you turned out
But in the end the blame's on you

And we all sympathize with your torn-apart heart
And your really artistic worldly views
It sells records when you're sad these days
It's super cool to be mad these days

I think rock and roll is really funny
when it's serious

Don't hate us 'cause we're happy
Don't hate us 'cause we're beautiful
Don't hate us if we make you smile
Or if we go the extra mile
To make someone feel better
on a really shitty day
And if you're hearing what I'm saying then
I want to hear you say, "I'm gay!" (I'm gay!)
Say, "I'm gay!" (I'm gay!)

Let's start a movement, let's start it right now
And if you don't know where to start
I can show you I'm your new team captain
Put your left hand over your heart
and repeat after me

It's perfectly fine to be a happy individual
It's perfectly fine to be a happy individual
Chris, Gary? You guys wanna join in?
(Yeah, buddy. Sure. Sorry Dude)
It's perfectly fine to be a happy individual
It's perfectly fine to be a happy individual
Very Nice. Very Nice.

Don't hate us 'cause we're happy
Don't hate us 'cause you're miserable
Don't hate us if we make you smile
Or if we go the extra mile
To make someone feel better on a really shitty day
And if you're hearing what I'm saying then
I want to hear you say, "I'm gay!" (I'm gay!)
Say, "I'm gay!" (I'm gay!)

That's right, ladies and gentleman!
Pick up the phone
'cause Bowling For Soup is on the line!
And you don't have to be sad anymore!
You don't have to be mad anymore!
We can all join hands and do ring around
the freaking rosie!
In fact, can we can get some "La la"s up in here?

It sells records when you're sad these days
It's super cool to be mad these days
I think rock and roll is really funny
When it's serious

Yo, where my "La la"s at!

La la-la la, la-la la-la
La la la la
La la-la la, la-la la-la
La la la la
La la-la la, la-la la-la
La la la la
La la-la la, la-la la-la
La la la la
La la-la la, la-la la-la

Why Don't I Miss You? Lyrics – Bowling for Soup

Remember back at Ryder High
Wishing on stars in the Texas sky
I got your name tattooed
Across my heart how could we lose
Back in black when we were hand in hand
Two young kids like Jack and Diane
Falling at the speed of light
Burning up never felt so right
So why I don't miss you
Tell me what I am supposed to do
After all the shit that we've been through
I can't feel a thing
Maybe I was too high
Maybe I just sobered up too soon
You're still on the dark side of the moon
And always on my mind
So why don't I miss you
So many nights we drove around
King and queen of the whole damn town
Voted most likely to succeed
We were everybody's meant to be
Burned out plans to take over the world
Did I fuck it up, or did we just get bored
Kept losing at the same old game
We had our 15 minutes of fame
We took it all the way
You can't say we didn't try
So why I don't miss you
Tell me what I am supposed to do
After all the shit that we've been through
I can't feel a thing
Maybe I was too high
Maybe I just sobered up too soon
You're still on the dark side of the moon
And always on my mind
So why don't I miss you
Why don't I miss the way you laugh
At everything I say
You mom's apple pie always blew me away
It's funny how I always write the same old song
I wonder if you ever sing along with me
Sing along with me
So why I don't miss you
Tell me what I am supposed to do
After all the shit we've been through
I can't feel a thing
Maybe I was too high
Maybe I sobered up too soon
You're still on the dark side of the moon
And always on my mind
So why do I miss you

A Friendly Goodbye Lyrics – Bowling for Soup

I can lay it on real thick
But I know how you don't like to get bogged down
With anything 'bout us
And our kick ass true love tale
Sorry I swore just then
Cause I know you hate it
And by the way that cake you baked me really sucked
But I ate it

[Chorus]
Cause I loved you
Even more that you could ever imagine
Here's a friendly goodbye
5,6,7
Ain't that a "b" with an itch
Ain't that a mother trucker
You can go to h-e-double hockey sticks
And f yourself
Cause I'm flippin' gosh darn sick
Of all the "s" words you put me through
So f-u
F-u

I can hang it out to dry
Cause I know how you like all your laundry neat
And not just thrown around
Like a chain saw in need of juggling
Sorry I flipped you off cause I know,
That you hate it
And that homemade porn I said that I erased
Well I saved it

[Chorus Repeat]

I'll send you a post card that says
I'm glad you're not here
I'll buy you a t-shirt
But I'll use it to wipe up the beer
That I spilled
While I was spilling my guts
To my friends about you
And I really don't have anything else nice to say

[Chorus Repeat]

Luckiest Loser Lyrics – Bowling for Soup

[VERSE 1]
Man your really one heck of a guy
Best friend since junior high
You showed me Playboy for the very first time
That was rad
We saw Bon Jovi we sat in the front row
I pierced your ear right before the show
We stole your brother's beer and he didn't know

[1ST CHORUS]
Your new girlfriend is a son of a gun
Did you fall in love or did
You just want to get some
That girl is crazy she's a lo-co-motion
I know you know she used to be my girl
You'd better run for cover
Cause she's tickin like a time bomb
And did i mention that youbothsuck.com
Now your stuck with her
Like Mellencamp is stuck with cougar.
I guess that makes me the LUCKIEST LOSER

[VERSE 2]
I met her at a kegger past out in the yard
Gettin in her pants wasn't really that hard
6 months later she crashed my car
That was rad
She's got a glow from her spray on tan
Marilyn manson is her favorite band
I really think she might worship Satan, not a band

[2ND CHORUS]
Your new boyfriend is a son of a gun
Did you fall in love or did
You just want to get some
That girl is crazy she's a lo-co-motion
I know you know she used to be my girl
You should run for cover
Cause she's tickin like a time bomb
And did i mention that youbothsuck.com
Now she's stuck with you
Like a frat guy with a bad tattoo
Like celebrity golf with Alice Cooper
Guess that makes me the LUCKIEST LOSER

[BRIDGE]
Mel Gibson, Danny Glover you deserve each other
A lethal weapon when you take her home to
Meet your mother
She was a superstar, back seat of my car
Those days are over, now the night goes on yeah

[3RD CHORUS]
Your new girlfriend is a son of a gun
Did you fall in love
Or did you just want to get some
That girl is crazy she's a lo-co-motion
I know you know she used to be my girl
You'd better run for cover
Cause she's tickin like a time bomb
And did i mention that youbothsuck.com
Now your stuck wit her
Like Mellencamp is stuck with cougar.
Like number two on a pooper scooper
I guess that makes me the LUCKIEST LOSER

Love Sick Stomach Ache (Sugar Coated Accident) Lyrics – Bowling for Soup

I woke up today.
That was my first mistake.
Would've been better off
In the middle of a dream
I was havin' bout a brighter day.
Yesterday, I gave my heart away.
By the middle of the day,
You could search for a sucker
and buy it now on ebay.

[CHORUS 1]
Hold your head up and face the day.
Seems like everybody's got a way
to say "I'm doing OK."
I'm OK as long as you're happy-
Without me.
Without my hand- to hold.
Without my jacket- to keep you warm when you're cold.
Oh yeah you're cold.
Popsicle love and pie crust promises,
Ice cream kisses that I'm really gonna Misses
Smith-sonian, peppermint, sugar-coated accident,
Empty Like a cavity, and now we're just history
And this is all I ever wanted.
I can take the heartbreak.
Can I get something for my lovesick stomach ache?
I threw up today.
I kinda sorta prayed
To go back in time and rewrite these lines
But I'll settle for a Bloody Mary.
"What's that?" you say.
You say you're not so OK.
Looking down from the top of a 30-foot drop.
That's exactly what you wanted.

[CHORUS 2]
Hold your head up and face the day.
Seems like yesterday you got your way.
But I am doing OK.
What's that you say?
You say you're not really happy without me.
Without my hand- to hold.
Without my jacket
To keep you warm when you're cold.
This is all I ever wanted.
I can take the heartbreak.
Can I get something for my lovesick stomach ache?
And this is much more than I needed.
(Can I have some Ginger Ale?)
I feel the agony of the defeated.
(Tell her she can go to hell.)
And if you really wanna make me feel better
Just don't let her take the sweater
I was wearing when I met her
Cause I know she's gonna say it was hers.
But it's mine. That shit is mine.

Popsicle love and pie crust promises,
Ice cream kisses that I'm really gonna Misses
Smith-sonian, peppermint, sugar-coated accident,
Empty Like a cavity, and now we're just history [x3]

Much More Beautiful Person Lyrics – Bowling for Soup

Jeanie has a dad that might as well be dead.
A case a day habit and 3 other kids.
She's a much more beautiful person
Than you'll ever know.
She hates the world
At least the one outside.
She's a Myspace kid living a virtual life.
She's a much more beautiful person
Than she'll ever know.

[CHORUS:]
Close your eyes and the time tick by.
In this life, it's OK to cry, sometimes.
It can be hard to see what's right in front of you.
You're gonna smile sometimes,
Your worlds will collide.
I know you're tired of waiting,
So when you're through with hating,
You'll be a much more beautiful person,
You'll be a much more beautiful person,
And now you know.

Tommy can't help but feeling alone,
Walking the halls with his head hung low.
And he's a much more beautiful person
Than he'll ever know.
High school kids can be so nasty
In a cut-throat war for popularity.
A much more beautiful person than he'll ever know.

[CHORUS]

And you don't feel so lucky,
But I've seen so many things in you.
Believe me, I know just what you're going through.
So stand up and take a bow,
Hold your head high
Don't ever let them get you down.
It's all about you
And it's long over due.
You're gonna smile sometimes,
Your worlds will collide.
I know you're tired of waiting,
So when you're through with hating,
You'll be a much more beautiful person
And now you know. And now you know.

Followers